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ACHALUGO's

The village square where humour, parenting and life experiences hold their meetings.

The Cyber-bullification of Love

And I wonder to myself, this manner of cyber bullying everyone is beginning to accept as normal. I cannot even start telling anyone to move on if they do not like a picture, impossible, the bitterness in their fingers usually wins. Why are your new loubs okay on your page and your friend at a nightout with her husband or fiance is not?

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What pocket money meant then…and now

If you think this is an economic post, about how inflation and increase in everything has made a mockery of pocket money value, sorry to disappoint you. I know some of you used N5 to buy three Galas and two... Continue Reading →

Spell Tired: A-c-h-a-l-u-g-o

This used to be a joke between my friends and I, during my undergraduate days. It is much more fun to watch us act it out, so I'm afraid the meaning may be lost to a few. Very simple o.... Continue Reading →

Mommy know thy role…and to thy role be true

I have gotten to that point in parenthood, where your kids are old enough to emotionally blackmail you. "Mommy, I won't play with you again" You better not think that is a meaningless threat, it works wonders. You just feel... Continue Reading →

What has number five got to do with anything?

What has the number five got to do with anything?  Anticipate! Achalugo

The way to a man’s heart…begins from the market

I engage in Food porn. I chase recipes up and down like no man's business. I want to add more ways to my twenty ways to cook Egusi, ten ways to prepare Oha, I like my Ofe Owerri having some... Continue Reading →

Why I don’t have a househelp…and why you shouldn’t

I hate sterotypes, strongly, maybe because I am a victim myself. There is a sport I cannot play, the sport of generalising, of using a one-size-fits-all approach to matters. I have been seriously referred to as Mammywater, kudos to my... Continue Reading →

How to do when all your kids are asleep

A rarerity just occured a few hours ago. All my kids are asleep At      the           same               time! I had a very good feeling that it would last long, tears of joy. So I quickly thought to share... Continue Reading →

ÓCHÚCHÚ MALLAM GANIYU (The Sack of Mallam Ganiyu)

Mallam Ganiyu bú ónyé nche Ezínúlò ndi be Odozie, kemgbe di ókpala ha bu Izunna bú nwatakiri. Anà àkwú ya ezigbo ego, obúrú ya na émépe ónú úzò ama fa, nya na emechi ya, nya na àkpú ókookò ósisi nííle... Continue Reading →

How Ogiri nearly put Kabiyesi in trouble

The secrets of the kitchen have been revealed to the women mostly by the gods, that is why sometimes a man will enter your kitchen and just misbehave.

Achalugo, Bras and Chocolates (ABC)

Over the years, enjoying my cravings and junk has proved harder than ABC. From dragging meat in soup with Kabiyesi, to having to hear that panic inducing "Mommy, cut for me" "Mommy, pour for me" A woman cannot have edible... Continue Reading →

Lights, Camera, Divorce!

I don't miss him, I miss who I thought he was.          -Anonymous Dear Husband, I am wife. This is us, living on the fast lane. Not really for me, but when you are married to someone doing so, you... Continue Reading →

Losing weight; the mouth style

I use my mouth to whine about getting the tommy firmer, the most exercise I do(if it counts), is those few seconds of sucking belle.

What if we are all justified?

I say sorry not because I am wrong always, but because I value my friendship/relationship more than being right.

Dividends of Mommacracy

I should have taken a photo of myself in my Khaki and baby carrier to match this post now that I think of it, let me not dwell on the past. However, confess, some of you people look at corpers... Continue Reading →

A quick one

You people remember from old posts that this was my service year abi? Fast forward to today and hopefully sometime in future I shall find a thing or two to blog about my corping experience. In the meantime, my dilemma;... Continue Reading →

Chaos is beautiful

My mom scowled at the 'Dirt is good' campaign for the Omo detergent years back. Not that she did not believe Omo could wash off all those stains as claimed, she was bothered with the message they were telling kids.... Continue Reading →

How I Won the Shit Packing Award

My selling point is this--->I pack it with grace and an enviable mien of normalcy

Oga, We Are Not Pregnant Abeg

"The man who says we are pregnant may challenge me years later and claim Omugwo rights" -Ani, goddess of fertility (1921)   For most people, the joys of double lines on a urine test strip catapults them to the top... Continue Reading →

Many things are thicker than blood…including Kunu

Recently, I have been doing a lot of history reading on the phrase "Blood is thicker than water".  I gleefully discovered what I had suspected all along, that it did not always mean what a lot people interpret it to mean these... Continue Reading →

Unleashing your inner ‘Caro’

It has been roughly forty-eight hours since we got to amuse ourselves with the bride-price app. In the middle of my yesterday, my friend sent me a bb-message with her bride price result. I forgot about the hot sun, and the agony... Continue Reading →

Marriage is not a school course work

The thing with books is selling point. A book with a target audience hardly ever suffers low sales, especially if the title na magnet to that audience. Marriage books; there are tons of them. They make good reads sometimes, in... Continue Reading →

MONITORED: BOOK REVIEW

Morenike Ademiju reviews Monitored, prose by Oladimeji Ojo. She is currently a student at the Nigerian Law School, Lagos Campus. When  not studying provisions of the law she reads novels, writes short stories and poems. Monitored is the story of... Continue Reading →

TODAY’S LOVE, TOMORROW’S INDIFFERENCE; WHY DO LOVE’S STORIES GO SOUR?

Olufemi Richard Akanni, legal Practitioner, writes from Lagos, Nigeria. I have often wondered what wasn’t done right when I hear of couples who courted for some time, got engaged and eventually brought friends and family together to witness and celebrate... Continue Reading →

Unplanned pregnancy and the married woman

I came across a married woman in October last year, asking people around for where she could have a safe abortion. It came across to me as a rude awakening that married women too get 'unwanted pregnancies'. I tried a... Continue Reading →

HEARTS OF A COLOR

Jonadab Utoh has a job but is looking for work. He does a lot of things and among those is speak his mind. He enjoys moments he succeeds at forcing himself to write. Dreamer, lover, bathroom grammy winning singer. It’s been more than... Continue Reading →

Onome and Politics

Nnaemeka Geoffrey Okahia studied, Unilag, Nigerian Law School,  LLM (in view), Global Sustainability Law department,  University of Ottawa,  Executive Leadership Programme at Ontario Institute of Governance He loves Unripe plantain and dry fish Lives in Ottawa, Canada. Actually, Onome wears braziers’... Continue Reading →

WE ALL NEED A GOOD BRA FOR SUPPORT

Freda Athena is a makeup artist/image consultant. Follow her tweets via @pinkrubbiez, Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/FABstyling 1: Bra Size Changes According To Body Weight- Eg Weight Loss/Gain, Pregnancy, Hormones Etc. Lots Of Women Wear The Wrong Bra. 2: Breasts Are Held Up By... Continue Reading →

How to Shop right + On the go tips for stylish moms

  “ You Are Not Just A Mom, You Are Your Husband’s Wife Also’’ - Freda Athena Benard Ogbolumani Freda Athena is a makeup artist/image consultant. Follow her tweets via @pinkrubbiez, Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/FABstyling It gets tiring and irritating when hear... Continue Reading →

RANDOM MAKEUP TIPS FOR MOTHERS ON THE GO AND RULES ABOUT OFFICE MAKEUP.

Courtesy: Precious Jatto, Eagles Pride Beauty When it comes to makeup for busy moms, it's all about prioritizing. By creating a short and comfortable routine to highlight your best features in the least amount of time possible, you can always put... Continue Reading →

Two brides and a baby review

TWO BRIDES AND A BABY: A DILENMA TUCKED IN MY MOVIE RACK. Authors are partial to their Wit, 'tis true, But are not Critics to their Judgment too?—Alexander Pope By Chizitere Ojiaka Imagine you’re bored out of your mind on... Continue Reading →

LETTER TO A BODYBUILDER’S WIFE

Dear Wifey, On this eve of our nuptials, I feel there are a few things you definitely have to know about marrying a bodybuilder. Bodybuilders, regardless of time or social acceptability, follow their passion. Those of us who toil in... Continue Reading →

Getting your pre-baby body back (or better)

Chioma Anyaegbu chats with Jane, who still turns heads after childbirth. Jane Ananyi is an Accountant, proud wife, mother to two kids.     Current weight. 68kg Dream weight I actually just want to maintain my weight by working out to get rid... Continue Reading →

ASK DOT EFEM

ASK DOT EFEM I am TheVunderkind. A lover without a lover, and an all-round nice guy. Hence, I finish last. Which isn’t a bad thing, if you know what I mean. Follow on twitter @TheVunderkind. DISCLAIMER: One, there is no... Continue Reading →

When Conception Goes Awry…

Adebukola Akintoye; I’m a friendly, bubbly,accommodating, open-minded, free-thinking, considerate and loving person. I’m into the business of making delectable and decadent confectionery. “A happy person is not a person in certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a... Continue Reading →

Much ado about a baby’s sex;a man’s viewpoint

  MUCH ADO ABOUT A BABY'S SEX; A MAN'S VIEWPOINT Sylva Nze Ifedigbo, writer and social commentator is the author of ‘The Funeral Did Not End’which is available for purchase here. He blogs at http://www.nzesylva.wordpress.com   X and O is... Continue Reading →

STAY AT HOME MOMS; THE REAL UNSUNG HEROES

THE STAY-AT-HOME MOM: THE REAL UNSUNG HEROES Adaobi Nneamaka Chikeluba, the only daughter among 4 brothers, is a fun-loving individual who strives for success at all times.  A graduate of Mass Communication from Babcock University, she also holds a Master's degree... Continue Reading →

ANDANTE, ANDANTE

Dike-Ogu Chukwumerije is a writer, an author, a poet, and a performance poet. He has a Law degree from the University of Abuja and a masters degree from the University of London. He is the author of several books –... Continue Reading →

The Gifts Conundrum

The Gifts Conundrum Arsenal fan, Anime fan, rocker, writer, homebody and introextrovert. Lawyer. I write regularly on http://www.ideaniverse.me. You can follow me on twitter @DisFeMIseF Hello folks! @DisFeMIseF here and I must say it is quite the honor writing here... Continue Reading →

VALENTINE GONE PERSONAL

Ilozumba Chukwuebuka is a young, vibrant engineer with deceptive looks to match (not doing away with it soon). I love engaging in healthy debates from time-to-time. Writing is not a do-or-die affair for me. Just enough to save my life... Continue Reading →

FOR THE LOVE OF WRITING…AND READERS

If you have had an ante-natal scan done on you, you would admit it may get a bit awkward sometimes. During one of my previous pregnancy scans, the doctor tried as always to keep up a conversation partly because he... Continue Reading →

Fruit of my Loins

FRUIT OF MY LOINS By Lilian Ezejelue. Lilian Ezejelue is the Writer of five bestselling novels, lots of block buster movie scripts that have set box office record and a great TV presenter. All this she achieved in her dreams.... Continue Reading →

MY BABY IS NOT JUST CUTE…

"Your baby is sooo cute!" This is one compliment I stopped paying any mother after I had mine. I prefer to tell the baby directly "Fine boy! Fine girl!" I always told Kabiyesi before we got married that the sight... Continue Reading →

Meat Market and other very short Stories

Meat Market. She smiled happily as Baba sliced extra chunks of meat for her. "It is for Sallah,Omoye"  he explained through age-browned teeth. The other meat sellers looked on in envy. Baba's line grew every weekend while they barely sustained one... Continue Reading →

Why you shouldn’t sell your husband’s playstation.

When I saw an OLX ad for the first time, I thought about what I could upload in my house and scream "Sell it!". My roving eyes rested on the Playstation. I dont know the playstation situation in your house,... Continue Reading →

LETTER TO MY FUTURE HUSBAND (reply)

This is a return-match. Before some people call Kabiyesi now and orchestrate kata-kata in the palace. My sister Ona had this post up a few days ago;  Letter to my future husband. I found it honest and exciting at the same... Continue Reading →

On nights like this…

3.15am My babies are sick and i'm sleep deprived. African reaction: All these witches have come again! Back to sender. Logical reaction: 1. Children falling ill is part of the journey. 2. 100watts wont leave her brother alone,even when I... Continue Reading →

TOUCH ME IN THE HEART…OR DONT TOUCH ME AT ALL

  "Touch me in the heart. Or don't touch me at all. If someone would just leave burning candles along the way, so we don't get lost. So we don't get lost..."-Dike Chukwumerije. I got lost. Not totally, but I... Continue Reading →

IN MEMORY OF HONDA…

Honda is the dog I had for a few weeks many years ago. I love animals but same cannot be said of Kabiyesi. Are my kids going to have their own dog,cat or rabbit much later? To be honest, i... Continue Reading →

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