How to do when all your kids are asleep

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A rarerity just occured a few hours ago. All my kids are asleep

At
     the
          same
              time!

I had a very good feeling that it would last long, tears of joy. So I quickly thought to share the very best thing to do when you get this miracle at your bedpost. You will be needing the following;

1.Bathroom
2.Soap
3.Hot water
4.Music
5.Mirror

And most importantly, your naked self!

You will then proceed to have one of the most uninterrupted bathroom dancing session of the year.

Woman, you are a dancer, bring it on! Forget that at children birthday parties, when they call you out to dance you replace Sekem with some uncoordinated feet shuffling. Someone even recently referred to your Shoki as ‘Yoruba Ela’. :'(:'(

These things do not move you, you are a dancer, ask your mirror.

Sing along. Because people worse than you went and embarassed theirsef at Project fame audition, so who says you cannot sing for yoursef in your bathroom?

Finally, mix that hot water in your bucket. Your mirror may be tired of you and all the goofy faces you have been making since, but that is its cup of tea.

Have a lux bath, woman.

“Lux bath” (Verb): The act of closing your eyes, smiling and rubbing a bar of  soap ever so slowly across your body with the belief that it will convince someone somewhere to go and buy the soap.

When all these is over, lay on your bed,  spike the music! Workout, woman, nothing serious. Just a few sit-ups so you dont feel guilty that you have been working out mouth style.

We work so hard, we mothers, take every opportunity for some you-time.

And if you choose to do this, don’t forget to lock your man outside. You did not embark on this relaxation journey to go and bring somebody that will look at you and just think that you are ready for another baby to keep you awake.

Achalugo.

4 thoughts on “How to do when all your kids are asleep

  1. “And if you choose to do this, don’t forget to lock your man outside. You did not embark on this relaxation journey to go and bring somebody that will look at you and just think that you are ready for another baby to keep you awake.”
    This part actually had me laughing… kai! see wetin dem turn men into…but then that what they are!!! LOL

    Like

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